I have written before about eschatological foolishness which Christians can so easily get themselves into. I have also written before about various false prophets and fruit loops running around at the moment, setting dates and causing mischief. So just last night I was thinking of writing a satirical piece on rapture fever and related issues.
But I see I have been beaten to the punch – and by Christians who are evidently perfectly serious. They are offering to look after your pets after the rapture takes place! I kid you not. Indeed, there are both Christians as well as atheists offering these services. It seems everyone wants to get in on the act – and make a quick buck.
The Christian version of this important service can be found here:
And the pagan version can be found here:
Both are very thoughtfully concerned about the welfare of your pets after you have been taken away – and both are happy to help things out here for a small fee of course. It seems that when it comes to making a quick – and rather dubious – buck, believers and non-believers are quite happy to lock arms.
The Christian site says this: “Dear Fellow Christian: As the Apostle Paul describes in Thessalonians as quoted above, at some point in the future Jesus will come in the air, catch up the Church from the earth, and then return to heaven with the Church. This is known as the Rapture and it will be glorious. But what of our pets? Who will take care of our pets when we’re gone? I’m Sharon Moss, and I’d like to help answer that question.”
Gee that is awfully thoughtful of her. She continues, “Our pets are given to us by God for us to care for. We are stewards of their lives. Should we simply forget them at the Rapture, allow them to starve or worse?” Of course a bit of money must exchange hands here:
“We have settled on charging a one-time 10 dollar registration fee to discourage fake sign-ups, while being only a small amount for serious people. Once you sign up through PayPal for $10, you get into your membership area where you can register all your pets. You will never pay another dime, your information is kept secure (never ever shared with anyone outside our organization), and you have peace of mind.”
The atheist site is a bit more blatant in its money grab. Indeed, these pet-loving pagans are especially adept at making a mint out of this. The very first thing we find on their website are these words: “Notice of Rate Increase: Due to the increased activity associated with the May 21, 2011 Rapture prophesy we have increased our service rates for all new contracts submitted as of 1/13/11.”
That Christian website should have done the same – they would be rolling in the dough by now. But getting back to those amicable atheists, we read further: “You’ve committed your life to Jesus. You know you’re saved. But when the Rapture comes what’s to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.
“We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you’ve received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus.”
OK, so what’s the bottom line here? “Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable. For $135.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $20.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged and feathered friends.”
Wow, these guys are just as thoughtful as the Christians are. Of course they are a bit brighter, sucking out a greater fee. But both will be laughing all the way to the bank. Who was it that said a sucker is born every minute? We would expect such gullible suckers to be found amongst unbelievers.
But when Christian communities provide a ready source of such suckers, then we are in big trouble. Indeed, I read the other day the results of a survey. It asked believers if they thought May 21 2011 was judgment day. While 98 per cent said no, two per cent said yes!
How any believer can fall for this foolishness is beyond me. But the lack of biblical literacy and biblical discernment is running rampant in the churches. We have perhaps the most weak-minded and theologically vacuous generation of believers on record.
When and if things will be turned around are some very good questions indeed. In the meantime, I have already written another piece on the May 21 foolishness. I will not post it until May 22. Not because I am hedging my bets, but to show just how foolish and gullible some Christians can be.
Some of these folks will not be convinced until May 22 rolls around. But even then, incredibly, some will not be convinced. Indeed, the false prophet pushing this date has been date-setting for decades now. But I will speak to this further when my article is posted in a few days time.
In the meantime, some wise words from Will Graham, grandson of Billy Graham, when asked about ‘doomsday’ predictions: “The fact of the matter is… we are all a heartbeat away from eternity. Whether you stand before God on May 21st, or whether you stand before Him 50 years from now, is irrelevant in the scope of eternity. The important thing isn’t when you stand before God; it’s where you stand with God.”