PC Nut Case #59,359

Political Correctness is not only a moral plague on any sane society, but it is also an indication of advanced mental deterioration. Some of the bizarre PC scenarios we read about in the press just never could be dreamed up by mere mortals. Truth really is stranger than fiction when it comes to the political correctness brigade.

Consider the latest example of idiocy, this time from the UK (which has been a regular source of such madness for quite some time now). The headline reads as follows: “Don’t put wire on your windows – it might hurt burglars! Villagers outraged after police order them not to protect garden sheds.”

Here is how the story begins: “Residents in Surrey and Kent villages have been ordered by police to remove wire mesh from their windows as burglars could be injured. Home owners in the villages of Tandridge and Tatsfield in Surrey and in Westerham, Brasted and Sundridge in Kent have said they are furious that they are being branded ‘criminals’ for protecting their property.

“Locals had reinforced their windows with wire mesh after a series of shed thefts but were told by community police officers that the wire was ‘dangerous’ and could lead to criminals claiming compensation if they ‘hurt themselves’. Surrey Police have defended the move but outraged residents have attacked the force for seemingly trying to protect criminals.”

OK, so let me see if I have got this straight: It is now the case in parts of the UK that anything that might make it difficult for a burglar, or make his chances of success less possible, is now to be regarded as criminal behaviour. And anything which makes it easier and safer for the criminal to accomplish his crimes is now legally protected.

Right. Makes good sense. Reward evil and punish good. Facilitate crime and criminals while ordinary home owners are penalised and thwarted from protecting themselves and their property. Turn home security into a crime, yet make life easier for home invaders of every kind.

Now that we have that sorted out, all that remains is to ask a few more questions. The most obvious one is this: if we are really serious about this, then why don’t we go all the way here? Why take only half measures when we can do the job properly? Let’s show every criminal how much we are concerned about him and his welfare.

Thus I look forward to the police in these locations soon issuing the following orders to supplement what has already been given:

-From now on all home owners will no longer be allowed to lock their doors or windows. After all, the process of breaking down a door or smashing a window could prove to be harmful to the burglar, therefore it is now off limits.

-From now on all home owners will have a large empty van with the engine running just outside their home. They must also have dollies and carts readily available nearby. We all know that if a burglar tries to carry away a heavy item, such as fridge or a plasma TV, he might injure his back. We certainly do not want the criminal element in town having unnecessary backaches, so this will now be official policy.

-From now on all able bodied men will be required to stay home from work every Tuesday and Thursday, so that any burglars who come then can have assistance in removing various items from the home. Once again, concerns about sore backs or strained muscles must be paramount, so such assistance to the criminal element will surely help reduce such risks.

-From now on all homeowners must have ladders leaning against their roofs, so that any criminal who still prefers the old-fashioned routine of breaking into a home through the chimney can still have that option available. Your local police are all about choice, you know.

-From now on every private residence must list on their front door all the prized valuables contained inside, so that burglars will not have to waste valuable time casing the joint to see what are the best items to purloin. The most valuable and inviting items must be listed first, and then down to less tempting items.

-From now on, a fully packed medical kit must be available, along with a standby fully-qualified nurse, so that if any home invader finds himself injured for any reason, he can receive instant top-notch medical care.

-From now on all home owners must hire a qualified chef to have luscious meals at the ready at all times. After all, if a famished criminal is ransacking the joint, his basic right to having a full stomach must be respected. Indeed, if a crim notifies the home owner ahead of time about his favourite dish, this must be provided within 30 minutes of the notification.

-From now on all property owners must have a ready supply of various drugs on hand. We all know that many burglars are simply invading homes to help meet their drug addictions. So if these drugs were available on the premises, this would make things so much more pleasant for any drug-affected crim as he goes about his rightful business of home invasion.

-From now on all home owners will provide police with a weekly summary of any burglaries which have occurred. If none have happened in the past seven days, then obviously the home owner is making things far too difficult for your average criminal, and steps must be taken to remedy this gross injustice.

-Finally, from now on, in the interests of making the life of criminals safer and more secure, all home owners will simply have to give their homes and all their possessions to any petty thug who asks for them. After all, the name of the game is to keep those crims safe, secure and satisfied.

I hope this bit of advice to these English police will help solve what have clearly been some real inequities and cases of injustice for the poor criminal element living in their communities. If the police need any more such advice, I am always available to offer it. After all, I too have the criminals’ best interests at heart.


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29 Replies to “PC Nut Case #59,359”

  1. I find that very funny. Hope the PD in question gets internationally shamed and backtracks.
    Alison Keen

  2. Perhaps we can send your ten well thought “burglar PC/concerning welfare” list to the Greens… After all they’re bright on ideas.
    Panage Kontos

  3. Hey careful don’t give them new ideas, these ideas could end up being taught in a social justice university class!
    Dan Brinkman

  4. It all boils down to Human Rights and litigation and thus the victim is turned into the criminal. The lunatics have taken over the asylum! The tail is wagging the dog! The police apparently now consider themselves a service rather than a force and that’s where it all went wrong as far as I am concerned.
    Rachel Smith

  5. A few years ago when I came home and found the house ransacked, the police came (eventually) and gave me the phone number of a “trauma counsellor”. They said the burglary was more or less my own fault because I lived in a secluded residence in a lonely place.

    Perhaps I ought to have left a key in the door and saved the burglars the trouble of breaking it down.

    Alex Anderson

  6. I suppose having a KEEP OUT sign on your property will be regarded as a xenophobic hate crime. Punishable by being forced to read The Guardian every day for a year.
    Iain Duncan, UK

  7. I might speak in the PD’s defence hear. I agree this is just idiotic and to my mind a criminal in the commission of a crime should actually not be entitled to any rights or protection at all. Someone breaks into your house you should be allowed to do to them pretty much whatever you want. But leaving that aside.

    Keep in mind the reason the police gave for saying the wire should be taken down. They said, “that the wire was ‘dangerous’ and could lead to criminals claiming compensation if they ‘hurt themselves’”.

    The problem it would seem is that the police are actually in a bit of a bind here because some complete moron decided that criminals in the commission of a crime were entitled to compensation if hurt during the crime.

    I agree the outcome is completely crazy but I don’t think blaming the police in this case is the right people to blame, they are just the ones with the thankless job of enforcing this rampant idiocy.

    Jason Rennie

  8. I spent part of my childhood living only a few miles from Westerham, Brasted and Sundridge in Kent. I remember those places well, but on reading Bill’s report I fear they’ve changed beyond recognition.

    Iain (above) proposes a singular punishment of being forced to read The Guardian every day for a year.

    I think that is altogether excessive, Iain, and would surely be banned under Britain’s modern-day laws forbidding “cruel and unnatural punishment” (i.e., torture). I’m sure it would also contravene several EU human rights rulings.

    Being forced to read The Guardian would be almost as terrible as being forced to read The Age.

    John Ballantyne, Melbourne, Victoria

  9. Hi Bill,

    I don’t know. After reading your previous article about Dr Salvulescu, this article indicates that he may have been onto something. 🙂

    On the other hand, these criminals should be carrying out adequate due diligence when exercising their craft and come appropriately equipped to deal with these obstacles (wire-cutters perhaps), before they start claiming compensation for injury.

    Excellent articles Bill. You are a lamp on a hill. Keep shining.

    Steven Harrison

  10. Many thanks Steven

    But I would have thought that the homeowners should have to provide the wire-cutters. That would, after all, be the loving thing to do. In fact, the UK should have an annual “Be Nice To Criminals” day lined up as well. Or maybe a “Criminal Appreciation Month”. And a Crim Pride march would also be worth holding.

    Bill Muehlenberg, CultureWatch

  11. Bill,

    Don’t forget a national sorry day to apologise for the former barbaric practice of ‘stealing’ generations of criminals and locking them up. 🙂

    Mansel Rogerson

  12. Yes Bill I agree it is totally idiotic to say the least. I have had my house burgled in the past and the police when they finally arrived done a quick report and gave me a copy for the theft and damage for the insurance if I had it they informed me my chances were slim of getting anything back that was the last I heard from them.
    Colin Clifford

  13. Back in the 1990s I was part of an organisation called PALS (People Against Lenient Sentencing), headed up by a police sergeant. He told me in the course of things that because of the idiotic state of the law, whereby the criminal was protected by human rights legislation, that if a burglar entered your home and you resisted, make sure that it was only you and him, and then shoot him, or otherwise kill him. Then you could claim that it was self defence, and no-one, not even a court, could contradict you. That’s why that same police sergeant said publicly, “If anyone presumes to come into my home with the intent of stealing my property or harming my family, he will leave in a body-bag!”
    Now I agree that such a course is horrific, but in such a legal situation as we now have, where the left has turned our justice system on its head, is there an alternative? I know that we must observe Matt.5:39-41 for ourselves, but for our families and loved ones – do they not need our protection?
    Another fact that my policeman friend pointed out was that that almost the entire legal profession are members of civil liberties groups. Such organisations would not survive if the legal eagles were herded out. Just as it used to be said that the Church of England was the Tory Party at prayer, so Liberty Victoria and similar groups elsewhere is the legal profession in meditation!
    Murray R Adamthwaite

  14. Another example of victimhood of those who are offenders, and victims being criminalised.

    Much like the Islamists who make out the Jew, Christian, Hindu etc that they attack is the ‘criminal’, and that the Muslim is the ‘victim’ who must attack them for Political Coran-ness. (I know, it should be a Q or a K.)

    BTW, will this abandonment of security apply to Buckingham Palace, airports, jails etc in the UK?
    “We can’t have those awful brutes with the bearskin hats pointing their rifles at someone and giving them an awful fright,” said his Royal PCness, Prince Charles (PC!).

    Michael Evans

  15. On the Tony Martin case: if the wikipedia article is accurate, it seems he shot them as they trying to run away. That’s a very different situation to defending yourself against an actual or likely attack.

    More generally, I think there’s a point where “home defense” does become unreasonable, which is when one sets “traps” designed to injure or kill. I don’t think proactively causing harm is an acceptable first response to deal with trespassers. But using wire mesh to cover a building obviously falls a long way short of this.

    Andrew White

  16. Wow. Just… wow.

    This is exactly why I maintain my position that Romans 13:3-4 is NOT referring to what we know today as “government”


    3: For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to evil. Do you want to be unafraid of the authority? Do what is good, and you will have praise from the same.

    4: For he is God’s minister to you for good. But if you do evil, be afraid; for he does not bear the sword in vain; for he is God’s minister, an avenger to execute wrath on him who practices evil.

    Does this definition sound like the governments of this age? Certainly not!

    Nathan Schellinger

  17. Bill, I am shocked at both your insensitivity towards the oppressed criminal class as well as being surprised that you missed the most obvious extension of your line of thinking. Namely–don’t forget to leave a plate of cookies and a glass of milk on the kitchen table (assuming it hasn’t already been looted) for the welcomed intruder.
    Steve Swartz

  18. If you are going to leave cookies make sure the are low in fat, sugar, and preservatives. Select only those with the Heart’s Foundation tick of approval. Being overweight may jeopardise the criminal’s career and you don’t want to be responsible for the crim’s loss of earnings.
    Des Morris

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